"I'm one of the pretty ones! STFU, vange!"

Do you love porn?  Or porn stars?  Specifically their tongues?  We have quite a few tongue albums dedicated to porn actresses, mainly because it is easier to find tongue pix of  a porn actress than of a real actress.  The trick is in cropping out all the cocks and cunts while still maintaining tongue integrity.  I’ve definitely honed my cropping skills over the last couple of years, all for you, my tongue loving pervs.  I’ve also picked up more than my share of trojan viruses and malware while searching for these tongue pix.

I find it interesting a woman who isn’t particularly attractive can make quite a career from porn.   I’ve always chalked it up to the fact they are too ugly to land real movie roles but these butterfaces are willing to take it in the ass on camera and that’s better than waiting tables at Hooters.  I guess? I hear Hooter’s girls make good tips.  But what do I know?

I find myself wishing I could give them hair and make-up tips.  Better lighting and some good foundation with a deep conditioner would work wonders for most of them.  Then again, it occurs to me, the target audience likely doesn’t care if her make-up isn’t blended into her jawline or her eyeliner is smeary and crooked.

Click and be tonguey pornoriffic!

Janine Lindemulder PORN Tongue

Sunny Lane PORN Tongue

Silvia Saint PORN Tongue

Boroka Balls/Borre PORN Tongue

Brianna Banks PORN Tongue

Gianna Michaels PORN Tongue

Jenna Jameson PORN Tongue

Last week I talked about how silly it was that some sites were doing a Megan Fox boycott on August 4th. Completely unnecessary. So, I said August 4th would be Megan Fox Day around here so, amazingly enough, I’m about to follow through with that.

Is there too much Megan Fox coverage out there? Sure. But is that coverage really rising to the level of annoyance that would lead to a day long blackout? Doubtful. It’s not like she’s Lindsay Lohan or Britney Spears. Or, the Yankees and Red Sox.

So, I’m gonna scramble up three more stories on Megan Fox; you feel free to bitch about Megan Fox in this post.

Megan Fox
Megan Fox Tongue

"Is the ban actually about my deformity?"

LOS ANGELES, Calif. –

Is Megan Fox wearing out her welcome? A dozen male-centric Web sites are reportedly imposing a ban on the starlet – for one day, at least.

According to The New York Daily News’ Gatecrasher, sites including Asylum.com, Ask Men, Just a Guy Thing, TheBachelorGuy.com and Double Viking have deemed August 4 as “a Megan Fox media blackout day.”

“You can have too much of a good thing,” AskMen.com’s Editor-in-Chief James Bassil told the paper, “We’re joining in the media blackout and giving our readers a one-day reprieve from the woman we’ve been drowning in all summer.”

I am kind of at a loss for words after this article. I mean, what’s the point? Really, someone finds this to be necessary? Fuck that. August 4th will be Megan Fox Day around this joint; well, it would be but I’ll forget. So, let’s just assume it would be Megan Fox Day here if I didn’t forget I set up a Megan Fox Day.

All this chick is doing is insulting her movie producers, looking hot and working. Sure, she makes some mistakes (hello Brian Austin Green), but we shouldn’t damn her for that.

The article goes on to say they one of the sites wants to give some publicity to some chick they call “The Poor Man’s Megan Fox”. I’ll be honest:  I don’t think that exists. Unless by “poor man” you still mean some dude with several Porsches.

Megan Fox Photo Album

Megan Fox Tongue Album

Megan Fox Topless Album

This is the picture that launched this whole big undertaking.

We started out simple: just a few tongues hosted on Supload. This was before we realized how many people actually enjoyed looking at them, and before we discovered the wonders of Coppermine. Since those humble days, the Superficial Gallery has dedicated itself to cornering the tongue niche market. And folks, I’d say we’ve done a pretty good job because SG has officially surpassed the 3,500 tongue milestone! (And if you’re wondering, it was the tongue of Serena Williams that put us over the top). It’s safe to say we have the largest collection of celeb tongues on the internet. (Seriously, Google “celebrity tongue pictures” and see which website comes up first!)

Of course, none of this fetishy goodness would have been possible without the tireless work of Evangeline; she built the whole mine from nothing and is quite possibly the most awesome person on the planet and someone whom I’m proud to call a friend. Not to mention Loolpooq and the fine people over at The Tongue Show who have helped build up our awesome tongue section this past year. Oh, and Acadia deserves mentioning too, for being such a good boss. Now enough of this mushy crap and let’s get on to the tongues! Below is the Jessica Trifecta. Perv out, my friends.  We do it for you.  And the glory.

Jessica Alba
Jessica Biel
Jessica Simpson

I'm still a sexy vixen. Look! I'm licking a whip and wearing plastic.

I snagged this pic thanks to Loolpooq at The Tongue Show and it’s a pretty good one of her.  I’m just curious the circumstances surrounding the taking of it.  I have no idea if this is from a photo shoot for a…uhhh…Japanese sex toy store or a random tackle and feed company or what.

My best guess is she has noticed no one is interested in her any longer.  She got married, made her already-long name longer, spent an entire season looking fat and frumpy and Desperate Housewives is in the shitter.  Yeah, I’m pissed they killed off Edie.  She was my fave.  The show will suck without Edie and I will be pissed if she makes appearances from “beyond the grave.”

At any rate, I’m thinking she felt she had to up the ante a bit and try to remind us she is still a curvy, naughty girl who can cram herself into unforgiving fabrics.

I have this weird thing I do when I watch Dave and Conan.  When the guests come out, sit and cross their legs, I always look at the bottoms of their shoes.  For some reason, I am fascinated to see who is wearing brand spanking new shoes and who is wearing scuffed older ones.  In my informal and unscientific research, I have found that the bigger and more established the celeb, the more likely they are to have scuffed soles.  Random nobodies, new to the scene starlets and Paris Hilton tend to have pristine soles.*

I gathered up 50 some new pictures of Megan Fox and was shocked by the one up top.  She isn’t famous enough to wear scuffed shoes and for a photo shoot especially.  She skewed my data!  I always thought of her as Angelina Lite but that vibe isn’t coming through this set.  Hmm.  This is all disjointed and stupid.  I have new tongue pix, too.  Vote then look at all her albums.

Megan Fox

Megan Fox Tongue

Megan Fox (Mostly) Topless

*Their souls are another story altogether.