It’s fall, which means TV is good again. Here’s a sampling of what to watch (or record) tonight.

A strange medical illness is suddenly cured at the last moment by a brilliant doctor and his team of masochistic sidekicks.

Naomi tries to reunite her parents; Annie gets an audition; Nobody eats a sandwich; Viewers remain bored; Tori Spelling wins again.

It’s embarrassing to admit that anything on ABCFamily is good, but this show is definitely a guilty pleasure. Little known fact: Casey is played by Kelsey Grammar’s daughter. This week the Enginerds party gets out of hand and the ZBZs go to their annual sorority convention.

It’s no Psych (it’s totally Psych) but it’s still worth watching. Detective Patrick Jane attempts an undercover investigation into the puzzling murder of a waitress.

This show needs to pick it up or it’s going to lose us. At least bring back the cow.

Gavin and Stacey tie the knot (already!); Nessa fesses up regarding the bun and her oven. Will Gavin’s mum fess up about meat?

No matter what the description is, I guarantee hilarity ensues.

An essay written by an assistant principal in Ohio.

By J. Bradley

“Where are the heroes of today?” a radio talk show host thundered. He blames society’s shortcomings on education. Too many people are looking for heroes in all the wrong places. Movie stars and rock musicians, athletes, and models aren’t heroes: they’re celebrities.

Heroes abound in public schools, a fact that doesn’t make the news. There is no precedent for the level of violence, drugs, broken homes, child abuse, and crime in today’s America. Education didn’t create these problems but deals with them every day.

(more…)

Have you ever looked at your toilet paper and said:  This needs foam?  Me either.  But that’s because we lack vision.  The people at Bye Bye Dry have created a product that…well, let’s let them tell us:

Aaah! Toilet Paper Foam Moistener is a new, environmentally-friendly solution that uses the natural absorbency of toilet paper to apply wetness for effective cleansing and natural ingredients, leaving a soothing, fresh and clean feeling without extra waste.

Still confused?  Well here’s a video.  No shit.  A video.  This place is real.  If anyone buys any – let me know how it works out.

Happy butt wiping!

This is just bad ass.  I am working on one now where it is Death Star over Yavin.  Oh wait, that is just a clip from Star Wars.  Whatever.  I don’t make things – I just show them to you.

Don’t need to say a lot about him.  He died at 83.  He made movies, raced cars and made his own popcorn and salad dressing.  I have done all of those three things, too – but I wasn’t good at any of them.  That’s just one of the many differences between him and me.

I am giving you the trailer for Slapshot, which is one of the funniest movies of all time.  And I am pretty sure it is the only movie Paul Newman was ever in where he said: “Hey Hanrahan!  Suzanne sucks pussy!”  Except maybe The Sting.  Anyway – he had a good run.  Go watch Slapshot.  You’ll laugh.  Or go look at pics of him.  He was better looking at 80 than I was the day I got that Extreme Makeover.

I was looking for a picture on Google and, for once, the first 17 results were not porn (dammit).  But, in typical Google fashion, I found a pic that has NOTHING whatsoever to do with the keywords.  However, in this one case, the picture is vexing me.

It’s one of those fake successorie things and it has a pic of a forest.  And something in the forest is circled in red.  It says:

MINDFUCK

When you see it you’ll shit bricks.

The problem is, I can’t see it.  So, if someone sees it, please post in the comments what the hell it is.  Thanks.  Jerks.