Posts Tagged ‘Twitter’
This week we find out that I wasted my whole night last night and it was Beans‘ fault. Also Melzer is a millionaire. And we made fun of Ned Stark being dumb and The Killing and I forgot that I already asked if I could do a kickstarter campaign so people will buy me an HP Touchpad and was told no. Screw you people. Give me money. Or a Touchpad. And click this:Follow @Acadia.
Oh and check out the trailer for the end of Harry Potter. How much does Voldemort Scream?
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NYt1qirBWg
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Blah blah Charlie Sheen. Honestly, I’m too lazy to write about him. He’s a shithead and I am not wired enough into Hollywood to have any good insights or connections. I do things like follow Mika Brzezinski on Twitter and holy shit it is boring. She doesn’t do anything but roll her eyes and pronounce words wrong while other, more interesting people are busy wielding machetes. But I’m not going to cry about it. Oh no. Instead, I’m going to go through some of the gossip sites and give you a taste of their jokes and then you can decide which one you want to click. But if you click them – you better fucking come back! Jerks!
- The Blemish – “waving a machete around. Presumably this will be what he uses to cut the throats of children with.”
- WWTDD – “He also drank a bottle of something labeled Tiger Blood. That label looks fake though, so it’s probably just baby blood or something.”
- The Superficial – “And by peoples I mean his paycheck from the last eight episodes Warner Bros. canned because you can’t pay hookers in catchphrases. I’ve tried.”
- Perez Hilton – “Now, it looks like Charlie’s machete move may be a little bit less disturbing
but still pretty disturbing.”
OK, so all this exercise did was piss me off. Honestly, I actually LOOKED for funny jokes about Charlie Sheen waving a machete around on the roof of a building and I found four sites. And really not that many funny jokes. I had to include Perez, and that guy wouldn’t know funny if a clown came in his face. Or something. Anyway, I now realize that the celeb sites all suck and that if this gimmick is going to work I will need more things to pick from. So where do you go to see Britney’s Spears’ butt crack and find out what Russel Brand…did?
This week’s episode is one of my favorites in a while. Here’s the run down:
- Melzer has never flown on a plane.
- Jenny Beans has taken over Pittsburgh in the new Hometown Pride feature we have cooking here. Get involved!
- We all met a nympho (NSFW)
- I thought to myself that I want more followers on Twitter
- Go like us on Facebook. Im sick of not having 200.
- If you have a Tumblr – put the link in the comments so I can follow you. I use mine to publish the horrible racist crap that I get sent to me in my emails by “patriots” who want to “take their country back” I guess from the non-whiteys.
- Melzer is gonna write a book called: “Ass Zombie”
- We got a new Dirty Word
- Adorable Kate thinks I’m awesome!
- I need someone to help my iTunes thing – it doesn’t work right.
That’s pretty much it I think – I drink a lot of lighter fluid so I don’t always know.
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I managed to get the time to stop blinking on the DVR. Now on to World Peace!
It turns out that England’s Royal Family is a lot like us. They’ve joined Facebook where their page features news and pictures of Queen Elizabeth II and her family. Clarence House, that’s the residence of the Prince of Wales, even has us following the Royals on Twitter. It was said that the late Queen Mum was the last Royal to have her toothpaste put on the brush by her servants but I’m sure there are pixies that maintain Facebook and Twitter for the Royals.
It shouldn’t be said that the Queen isn’t tech savvy though. She sent her first e-mail in 1976 long before most of us even thought of having a computer and she owns the very latest Blackberry and an iPod. It’s said that she watched the Beatles movie The Yellow Submarine three times she liked it so much. Do you suppose she has the Beatles on her iPod along with Handel and other tasteful classical music? …
Let's go already!
I’m not going on a trip (don’t worry) but I was wondering who is. There is all sorts of hubbub about Please Rob Me that shows all sorts of assholes telling the whole internet when they aren’t home. That’s why I only lie on Twitter. Actually I only lie on the whole internet. You cute thing.
Either the water is underpriced or the soda is overpriced.
Questlove, the drummer for Jimmy Fallon’s band the Roots took this picture and put it on Twitter. I’m going to forego all the outrage and the jokes based on said outrage. I’m also going to avoid posing the potentially incendiary theory that the menu could be considered by some to be historically significant for black people. What I secretly hope is that a bunch of people flip out for real and then they will find out that some black person thought up the idea. That will confuse everyone. Also I guess my hope is no longer a secret.
Seriously, though. I really want to know what you think about this one. I mean – what if it didn’t say in honor of black history month? What if it said: by special request? What if it isn’t really from NBC? As much as I WANT to believe that it is real, how come they can’t spring for the NBC logo on their menu thingy? And how much is the NBC discount? And what if it was Jay Leno’s idea?
sigh.
so do your bitching in the comments. Or post ways it could be worse for NBC. But if you are gonna try to be funny, you better succeed.