The 5th night of Hanukkah is devoted to silence.  Just don’t say anything.  Not a damn thing.  Don’t even mention to anyone how cool Ving Rhames can be.  Everyone likes quiet.

Once the human noises have stopped, you can start hearing all the other noises your house makes.  Fuck that clock is loud.  What the hell is the Tivo doing?  The TV isn’t even on.  Do I always wheeze like this?  Should I see a doctor?

The 5th night of Hanukkah is widely regarded as one of the most enjoyable night of the whole holiday by deaf people.