Jello shots, mmmm.

Today, I’m speaking to you folks as a proud alumni of the Pennsylvania State University.

Looking for a party? You should be able to find one at Penn State. The school in University Park, Pa., tops the list of party schools and colleges with the widest use of beer, says the new edition of The Princeton Review’s The Best 371 Colleges.

Damn right I’m looking for a party. Penn State had been in the top ten milling about the top rank quite a bit over the last decade. All the hard work and dedication to get to the top was finally rewarded yesterday with this declaration.

I remember this one story of when I was at PSU and visited another college. Now, this school being VIRGINIA, I figured they cared more about being smart than partying. Yet, they bragged when we got down there about how much they partied. Then, as the night went on, motherfuckers were surprised that at PSU they partied Sunday-Wednesday, in addition to the weekend. You don’t get to number one by taking days off. That is for damn sure.