So I was thinking about the Matrix last night while I was watching the Wolfman. Why? Cause The Wolfman was pretty frigging boring but also because it was set in the late 19th century. So then I was thinking. Why did the machines fuck up so badly in The Matrix? See, if I remember it right, the machines kept all the humans in pods and sucked their…tasty juices or something while making the humans think they were living in a regular world. They had jobs and restaurants and hats and everything was fine.
Except The Matrix was fatally flawed and if they had consulted with me, the Machines would still be all fat and sassy and in charge.
See, the problem the machines had was that they let the Matrix have technology like phones and computers and good guns. So when Keanu Reeves was getting recruited he understood that there were machines in the first place. That’s where the machines went wrong.
They should have made Matrix word be the early 19th century. What do they care? It’s just programming. Unless it was really hard for them to make horses look real then having a society whose technology was really primitive seems like it would have been a good idea. If there was no such thing as a phone then how could people escape the Matrix? They couldn’t, that’s how! And even if someone from the outside could somehow get in, how would they explain computers and shit to someone from 1815? They couldn’t, that’s how!
So, old timey Matrix means a long happy life for the Machines. They messed it all up and I feel badly for them. Poor machines. *pets cell phone* It’s ok, buddy. You’re a “smart” phone!
But it they did it your way, there would only be 1 movie and it would be 15 minutes long.
Of course, that’s not necessarily a BAD thing…
Yeah but then they could have had way more adventures as they tried to…musket fight?
Interesting concept….though couldn’t the humans have developed the technology again? I guess the machines could have wiped out any people making technological advances.
The problem was the flux capacitor. See when Marty McFly went back in time and because that happened before the Matrix, he screwed it up for the machines because he had already brought technology back. Don’t forget John Connors was also going in and out of time so he would have screwed it up if Marty hadn’t already. Seriously dude, you have to think these things through a little more.
I now blame H.G. Wells and will use him to fix it. Cause Mary Steenburgen is a time travel constant.
Garbage in, garbage out, machines first law.. hence, old skool clothes and cars with big guns, kung fu, and rotary phones..
Where does the kung fu come in? Like – why didn’t they program in some slap fights?
As was described in ‘Animatrix’, the machines had already built an earlier matrix but it failed because their human captives grew to realise that it was too perfect. Hence the inbuilt struggle between man and machine that the machines ENGINEERED, you idiot.
And how could the humans have realised that the first matrix was too perfect? Because they could only have had an earlier experience to draw on for comparison, so that would be their lives before they lost the war against the machines. So the machines needed to harvest their memories or at least build a simpler, earlier society to base that matrix’s illusions around, BUT – who in the early to mid-21st century knows anything about life in an early 19th century European society?
Anyone? And don’t all rush at once to say THE AMISH because you’ll be talking out of your arses. The Amish use electricity and understand 21st century contract law probably better than you do.
Wait.. does anyone want to start bleating about Kung-Fu and telephones and hacking?
Kung-Fu’s been around longer than America, so no anachronism there.
Telephones? Compare two telephones from 1900 and 1990 and OMG! while they both appear to be based on the same technological infrastructure THEY REALLY FUCKING AREN’T.
Hacking? Lose forty years and you’ve still got the same answer.
BESIDES. The machines engineered the entire war, six times over before Neo showed up. They still knew (from Neo’s meeting with The Architect in ‘Matrix Reloaded’) that the humans could reject the matrix but they’d already allowed for that.
Did you even watch this film?
1: I’ve seen Jaws like a million times.
2: Your theory seems to be based on something called an Animatrix which would either be a cartoon, a porn or best yet, a cartoon porn. Anyway I didn’t see it.
3: I would think that people would know about 19th Century English society by reading the five million books about 19th Century English society.
4: Where did the humans get all the wool for their itchy-ass clothes if they had no sheep?
Acadia, I have to admit, even I’ve seen Animatrix. What world are you living in? First, you’d never seen Shawn of the Dead…not Animatrix..TSK TSK!
I had a crazy Asian message where this chick went all “Matrix” on me. At one point I think she had her feet up on the wall as she was rubbing my shoulders. I highly recommend her.