Metastasizing cancer is so oddly beautiful.
LONDON — International cancer experts have moved tanning beds and ultraviolet radiation into the top cancer risk category deeming both to be definite causes of cancer.
For years, scientists have described tanning beds and ultraviolet radiation as “probable carcinogens.”
I’m not entirely sure what a carcinogen is, but I think it’s one of those little cartoon forms of cancer that you see on kids’ programming. The bottom line is, tanning gives you cancer according to this study.
But you knew that. And you tanned anyway. Because damn, you got to go down to the shore this weekend and those Italian guys with the spiked hair will not even look at you if you’re not rocking at least the clementine look.
“People need to be reminded of the risks of sunbeds,” said Vincent Cogliano, one of the cancer researchers.
Right, but don’t they also need to be reminded of how pasty they’ll look if they don’t get hooked up on those tanning beds?
